Wednesday, October 25, 2006

i am still alive...sort of...

okay so i know that i haven't updated in a while. And i know i always say this, but things have just been a little hectic around here.

I am currently getting ready to move back home with the parents. This should be interesting. I don't think that they really want me to move back home. I think they are just pretending to be happy about it. But it has to be done in order for me to get back on my feet.

In the time i live at home i will be working on getting all my bills caught up. They ahve just gotten out of control. :( Mostly because i work at a job that doesn't pay me diddly crap and i have a $400 a month rent payment, on top of a car payment, on top of all the credit card bills that i got stuck with from the divorce :( So i will be able to get those straightened out when i move back home.

While i move back home i will work on going back to school. I need to finish my degree and there have been a lot of things that have been standing in the way of that. I have been too focused on everyone else to really take the time to get my life in order. Which brings me to the next subject...

Today i broke up with a guy that i had been dating for a while. It was really hard for me to do but i realized that i was investing more into the relationship then i was getting out of it. This relationship started off on the wrong foot anyways and so that didn't help much either. I actually just got done crying to my mom on the phone about this. Sometimes i just feel like i can't make the right decisions when it comes to dating. I find someone that i think i get along with, things go well for a couple of months, and then everything just starts going downhill. I think it is the type of guys i date. I date the ones who haven't really grown up yet. They still like to hang out with their friends and party and i am just not into that. I mean i don't mind it occasionally, but not every weekend. Also i seem to date guys that are just on a different page from me. I want to get married and have children. My ex wanted to get married but didn't want to have children and they guy that i was dating...well i am not sure if he wanted to either of those things. I know he definetly didn't want to have kids and there is no way i could deal with that. So who knows what is wrong with me? I don't understand why i can't find a person who shares the same interests and everything that i do. I mean i know i am not going to find someone who is perfect. But i do at least want someone who i can hold a whole conversation without feeling like i have to put on a front. Grrr...i am taking a break from dating for a while.

So yeah, that is pretty much what is up with me. what about all of you? What have you been up to?


Tuesday, October 03, 2006

Happy Birthday!

Today is me and Michelle's birthday. Yes, we were born on the same day two years apart. She is 22 and i am 24. And for some reason i am having trouble dealing with this birthday. I don't know why but i have been out of sorts the past couple of days because of it. maybe it is because i am now where near where i wanted to be at 24. It will all work out though....